Author Topic: For no particular reason..  (Read 31024 times)

Offline KoPP

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #45 on: January 10, 2011, 06:38:14 PM »
My tits are pretty big too.
Well, my girlfriend's were real.

Offline MadBob

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #46 on: January 10, 2011, 06:50:10 PM »
Mike,
I understand your last and therefor I have an

ANNOUNCEMENT

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed"
to "Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated"
or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since
the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have
been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last
time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588,
when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's
get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the
reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for
the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its
terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in
France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by
a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively
paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly"
to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain:
"Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful
Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also
have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to
deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new
Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries"
to "She'll be alright, Mate." Three more escalation levels remain:
"Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend", and
"The barbie is cancelled."

No worries about the snow cancelling the barbie operation in the ATL, witness the BGE in operation at 0200 by Mike in another thread.
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Offline rwcohen

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #47 on: January 10, 2011, 07:09:05 PM »
 
Quote

Wow Bob, have I unleashed a giant ?    I think we need less moderation (except for spammers) and more posting about restaurants and food we cook.   And of course the horrible snow etc......

Now, Mike, this is the Funny Farm room. I think it was a good choice. Of course, I'm still on antidepressants..................
« Last Edit: January 10, 2011, 07:11:51 PM by Mike GadgetGeek Stock »
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Offline Mike GadgetGeek Stock

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #48 on: January 10, 2011, 07:11:19 PM »

Wow Bob, have I unleashed a giant ?    I think we need less moderation (except for spammers) and more posting about restaurants and food we cook.   And of course the horrible snow etc......

Quote

Now, Mike, this is the Funny Farm room. I think it was a good choice. Of course, I'm still on antidepressants..................

I wouldn't have nominated Bob if I didn't think he could handle an un-moderated board..   LOL

.
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Offline LizR

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #49 on: January 10, 2011, 09:55:28 PM »
The Journey of Man

When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend with big tits.

When I was 16, I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.

In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional.  Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen,
cried all the time and threatened suicide.  So I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 25, I found a very stable girl but she was boring.  She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything.  Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 28, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her.  She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything.  She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy.  She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless.  So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.

When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her.  She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a girl with big tits.

Seriously, this is a joke?

I have passion, stability, excitement, intelligence, ambition and big tits. And I know more about food than probably anyone that you've ever met. And I'm an amazing cook. I can bring home the bacon and feed it to you in the most amazing ways that you've ever eaten pork belly in your life.

And I'm not joking about the big tits part. I have perfect tits. Just ask my husband.

And what do you have to offer?

Perhaps we need to lighten up a bit but I think I can understand a lot of everyone's points on this and don't mean to belabor it politically BUT - FG - substitue the gender pronouns, and "dick" for "tits" ( I am allowed to use slang for male sexual organs, right?), and maybe everyone will see the humor, or not, but to each his or her own!

Offline Jmolinari

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #50 on: January 10, 2011, 10:05:41 PM »
wait, is FG seriously offended? i thought she was just kidding...

Offline LizR

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #51 on: January 10, 2011, 10:30:14 PM »
I thought of a better reply - "best of luck to you Sir".

Offline uOTPia Dweller

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #52 on: January 10, 2011, 10:37:24 PM »
( I am allowed to use slang for male sexual organs, right?), and maybe everyone will see the humor, or not, but to each his or her own!

I will safely assume you can and it won't faze anyone.

Conversely if a male used the slang for female genitalia, he would get slammed. But the double standard is nothing new.

As far as rules for the off-topic stuff, I'd hope the only rule would be consistency.

Off color jokes, x-rated jokes, politics--as long as it's not selective. Ultimately, I agree with GG upthread. We should focus more on the on-topic stuff.  
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Offline LizR

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #53 on: January 10, 2011, 11:20:19 PM »
( I am allowed to use slang for male sexual organs, right?), and maybe everyone will see the humor, or not, but to each his or her own!

I will safely assume you can and it won't faze anyone.

Conversely if a male used the slang for female genitalia, he would get slammed. But the double standard is nothing new.

As far as rules for the off-topic stuff, I'd hope the only rule would be consistency.

Off color jokes, x-rated jokes, politics--as long as it's not selective. Ultimately, I agree with GG upthread. We should focus more on the on-topic stuff.  

Cal - there is no double standard on this board that I see, but there is a double standard in our society. I think that that is my point. I totally agree that almost anything is ok. But I think that for most women, referring to breasts as "tits" and implying that that is the only good thing about a woman may be not feel friendly. MB responded perfectly well and posted a couple of other funny things after that. But you do have to realize, as a father, that society makes a difference on how your girl or boy children will be treated in the long run. I know that you know that and that is all I'll say about it.

It is hard to know where to draw the line sometimes.I will leave it at this - anytime your hear a generalization about gender or a joke about it, consider how it would sound if the genders were reversed. It is really interesting. I don't think it is the men or males who are picked on in our lexicon, if you pay attention. What is your double-standard that you are subjected to?
« Last Edit: January 10, 2011, 11:30:30 PM by LizR »

Offline uOTPia Dweller

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #54 on: January 10, 2011, 11:33:23 PM »
( I am allowed to use slang for male sexual organs, right?), and maybe everyone will see the humor, or not, but to each his or her own!

I will safely assume you can and it won't faze anyone.

Conversely if a male used the slang for female genitalia, he would get slammed. But the double standard is nothing new.

As far as rules for the off-topic stuff, I'd hope the only rule would be consistency.

Off color jokes, x-rated jokes, politics--as long as it's not selective. Ultimately, I agree with GG upthread. We should focus more on the on-topic stuff.  

Cal - there is no double standard on this board that I see, but there is a double standard in our society.

I will admit that I am speculating, but I do believe on this board if somebody said the p-word or the c-word instead of dick, it may have drawn a reaction. But perhaps you are right and it would not have.

I do believe if somebody bragged about having a "perfect dick" and challenged one to ask his husband (or wife...or both), there may have been an objection, but perhaps you are right and it would not have.

I'd probably limit mine to PG-to-PG 13 double entendres and wouldn't personally initiate jokes involving religion, political bumper stickers on provocative topics, but all in all, as stated as long as one allows all or none rather than selective, I wouldn't sweat it.
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Offline LizR

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #55 on: January 10, 2011, 11:45:42 PM »
Me too. But you must admit that you like to stir things up, right? Totally fine with me . I like things spicy, and a lot of folks push things as well. More power to you and the board would be sadder without you. But I can still agree with Julia that that post was a bit odd. And MB has redeemed himself, so all is good in the neighborhood. Just wanted the menfolks to understand that "tits" may be the same as some less good feeling words about their own sexual parts.

And to be fair - I thought FG's post was a bit odd too! Aren't we all.
« Last Edit: January 10, 2011, 11:57:02 PM by LizR »

Offline KoPP

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #56 on: January 11, 2011, 07:38:42 AM »
Me too. But you must admit that you like to stir things up, right? Totally fine with me . I like things spicy, and a lot of folks push things as well. More power to you and the board would be sadder without you. But I can still agree with Julia that that post was a bit odd. And MB has redeemed himself, so all is good in the neighborhood. Just wanted the menfolks to understand that "tits" may be the same as some less good feeling words about their own sexual parts.

And to be fair - I thought FG's post was a bit odd too! Aren't we all.

I guess I'm mostly worried about the PC that hit so hard so fast on the 'other' board. I don't think any joke was directly or indirectly pointed at anyone (except for my comment about Cal - I apologize if he was offended), and all they are are jokes. Nothing I've seen was particularly raunchy (especially compared to SNL), and it is the Atrium, where the unmoderated stuff is supposed to go.

I guess that if folks are offended about stuff in the regular side of the board, it should be dealt with fairly quickly (and has been before). If there's a problem in the Atrium, I'd be more inclined to say don't read it.

And Mikey's right - efforts on the real side of the board are more pertinent.

Offline LizR

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #57 on: January 11, 2011, 07:51:49 AM »
Yep. Sorry I even participated, just couldn't resist.

Offline KoPP

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #58 on: January 11, 2011, 08:16:09 AM »
No need for apology as far as I'm concerned. I'd hate to think that folks can't speak their minds. I guess I've been trying to take most things less seriously nowadays and try to ignore the thorns... ;D

Offline Foodgeek

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Re: For no particular reason..
« Reply #59 on: January 11, 2011, 08:37:28 AM »
Wow. Just woke up and realized what a storm I apparently brewed.

Just to clarify: I am not offended by any words, whatsoever. I am not even offended by the "c" word, though I won't use it here because I am sure there are others who are.

I thought the joke was misogynistic, as Liz guessed, and it ticked me off a bit, but I'm over it now. I thought the implication was that "women aren't worth getting to know for their brains or their emotions or anything, so you might as well just get one who looks nice and who'll shut up while you do what you want to her."

It's OK. Lots of men feel that way and I'm sure it's very funny, from a certain perspective. I'm married to a man who likes me for more than my tits. He almost never motorboats them or anything. What a waste, eh Cal?  :D

Sorry about the ruckus. Carry on.
Food is my favorite.

 

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